I am.

I started writing this post titled "I am." After I read it I realized that it was just a bunch of whining. Really I have nothing to be upset about. I've been feeling a lot of disappointed thoughts lately but really the only person who can change that is myself. So I am rewriting this post with a positive twist.

I am grateful for this home that we cannot completely remodel in one month. It is far too much work and money for it to be perfect. Our family makes it a home anyways, not the trim or the 80's ceiling fans. I'm learning to let go.

I am patiently waiting to see what my next career move is. I had two opportunities materialize and now they seem to be fading. I am trying to figure out what it all means and once again should I just be happy where I am. I dreamed that I would run companies and head marketing campaigns, I thought I would teach children and change lives...maybe the lives I'm changing are right here in this house. I am okay with that.

I am blessed beyond measure for my husband. I've been giving a lot of thought on our relationship and how we can sustain it for the next 50+ years. We are so good together, I don't want to ever lose sight of that.

I am ready for summer. To sleep in and stay up late. To smell the beach on my kids and wash their stinky feet covered in the adventures from our day. Everyone asks what I have my kids signed up for and the answer is gymnastics for Meg and golf for Bailey. That is it. I don't feel the need to fill our every hour with activities. We have fun together and there is always something to do. I am tired of feeling less because my kids aren't in every campplaysummerprogramsportartclassvbs available. They just want to be kids. The school year is filled with running, I think my kids could use some unwinding.

I am working on faith and church and friendships. I won't really talk about this more right now because I'm praying on a lot of things and I don't want outside influences. But I struggle sometimes and I thrive sometimes.

So that's me right now. I am going to unpack some boxes today. I'm not sure I can live like this anymore and I just need to dig in...so here I go!

ps This photo has nothing to do with this post and is just the last picture on my photostream...I love it. She is all pirate. She ran through town yelling "Don't steal the booty" and made a bunch of people laugh.

Hitting the Pavement, again.

I have new goals lined up for 2012 and one of them is maintaining this dusty old blog. I find that I write more if I think someone else may read it. If nobody does, well that's fine too! It just helps me get things down if I think I might have an audience somewhere.


The Monday topic is going to cover Running and Exercise. I fell off the wagon so to speak and I need to hop back on. A couple years ago I quit my closet smoking addiction and filled that time with running. IT WAS HARD. I am not a natural runner at all. On top of the fact that I had damaged my lungs for so long, it was rough. I started walking/running and soon moved on to actual runs. After a couple months I no longer dreaded getting out there, quite honestly I looked forward to it. So much so that I ran a 1/2 marathon in 2010. Then I just stopped. I don't know why. Boredom perhaps? Lack of lofty goals? I'm not sure but once you stop it is so hard to start back up.


I tried last year, I really did. I even was running at a 9.30 mile pace, which is pretty good for me! I just didn't love it anymore. Kip was in school and it was really hard to find the time to get out and go. Really I made a lot of excuses. Tons of them in fact. It was too hot, too cold, I was tired, the kids needed something, I just wanted to relax, I didn't eat right that day...you see it's easy to find excuses, there are thousands.


As of today I'm back in. I ran 2 miles at approx a 10 min pace. Not bad considering the amount of Christmas cookies that have somehow attached themselves to my rear end. My lungs burn. My body hurts. I am starving. But I feel good. So I'm going to try to get back out there tomorrow. If I can get 2-3 miles 5 days a week for a month I'm going to sign up for another Half Marathon. And if I can keep up running until May, I'm going to get new shoes. I love buying running clothes and shoes. I think it was part of the initial addiction. I mean I had to look good while running right? Umm. Wrong. All I really needed was good shoes and I would have been good. If I spent as much time running as I did surfing the web for running gear I could have run a marathon instead! But I really want new shoes, I just don't technically need them yet. I love the ones I have but I think if I run for 5 months more in my old ones I deserve new shoes. So here I am in all my glory. I can't wait for it to warm up so you can actually see the stylish cold running gear I just had to have!

Spartans never leave other Spartans behind!

I have been joining Kip in doing Crossfit workouts for the past few months in order to prepare for the Midwest Spartan Sprint. The description said over 3 miles with mud and obstacles. No big deal right?

We had no clue.

Well it turned out to be around 4 miles of trail through very steep hills, wading mud pools, and more mud with obstacles thrown in, like jumping over fire, crawling under barbed wire, climbing up a soap covered wall, jumping over 9 foot walls, dragging around cinder blocks, carrying a tire up a mud covered hill etc. We were not prepared. It was a great time and I am so happy I did it, but let me tell you being sore is an understatement. I hurt in places I didn't know exist. I would say it was worse than the Half Marathon I ran a couple years ago. I jammed my finger and didn't feel it, my knees are bruised and scratched, and I am overall just plain sore. But again it was so stinkin' fun. I'm really sad they aren't doing a Midwest Sprint next year...just a Super. I am not sure if my body can handle a longer distance.

Here are some before and afters:





If there is one near you I highly recommend doing one. I was humbled at how kind and helpful everyone was. Sure people would run past on the straightaways, but as for the obstacles everyone really pulled together. Strangers were helping strangers. It was awesome!

to be 7 again...

These two have spent the past week together and so far very little fighting. Right now they are pretending to be a band. I'm trying not to laugh because I don't want to embarrass them, but it is so funny what they think the words to the songs are! hahaha

I'm looking into getting a blog overhaul. I don't know that I have the patience to figure it out myself so perhaps I will be purchasing a template somewhere.

The sun.

Feels like summer! It has been crazy here, even for Michigan weather. Either 50's and sunny or 70's and rain. After a long stormy weekend we finally had a gorgeous day yesterday. Not a cloud in the sky. We took advantage of the beautiful city we live in! First we saw some of the Barnyard statues downtown.



Then we walked down to the beach and played on the playground for a bit.


And finally time to cool down in the Compass Fountain.



We really are lucky to live here. I forget how beautiful it is and take it for granted often. It's Bailey's last week of school. We are really excited to have her home with us next week. I have lots of fun things planned. We are currently commitment-free and this is how I plan to keep it! The kids wanted to take another class at the Y but we would miss two of the lessons so we are going to wait. I think we may let Bailey take one Summer Camp session but other than that we are winging it!

So here's to summer!

Changes.

Life has changed since my last post. I lost my job and have been staying at home for the past 4 weeks. Craziness. I am enjoying my time with Megan and am excited for school to be out so we will have Bailey home with us too! I am casually looking for a job. I still really want to go back to school but if the right opportunity came along I certainly wouldn't pass it by. For right now we are just waiting to see what happens.

After going back and forth for about the millionth time we have decided not to sell our house. Seriously, sometimes my husband makes me crazy. I am glad that we are going to stay here a bit. Our house is really a good size for us. We could use a bit more room but it's doable. We are going to work on redoing one room at a time. Right now the focus is the yard. It is a disaster and the rain won't stop. We had new windows installed this week and our room is freshly painted. Just a matter of finishing the final details and we will have one room complete!

We also purchased a mini van. I wasn't super excited at first. I really wanted that cute little mazda 3 that went zoom zoom! But it wasn't really practical for our needs. The Pathfinder only has so many road trips left on it and we were cramped on our drive to Myrtle Beach. We ended up with a Town and Country, fully loaded van. It's nice and roomy. In fact we can't wait to have to drive somewhere to justify the purchase. Dave Ramsey wouldn't be happy with us but we were fairly smart about it. One paid off car/one car payment. It's not too terrible.

Next week starts the week of changing our bodies. I'm not fitting into any of my clothes and I am tired of feeling tired all of the time. I'm not sure if I will be able to run with my leg, but we will be doing some sort of exercize. The food is the biggest change. We are going all CLEAN. Yup. Cleaning out the cupboards and removing anything processed. The kids are going to have a fit. Hopefully they can adjust and will understand the benefits of only eating pure healthy foods.

So that's the update for now. Hope you have a fantastic day!

thank goodness this week is over

First the layout. Made with one of my favorite kits Studio Calico Who's Who. Seriously if you aren't a subscriber why not?! I pretty much stopped scrapbooking from the time Megan was born until she turned 2. Sure I still purchased new stuff and thought about doing it but it just never happened. Last spring I decided that instead of spending my money on stuff that I would never use i would buy one kit a month from Studio Calico. Best decision I ever made! I scrapbook all the time now. Love SC and the community there.

Now the bad week. First Kip was busy all last weekend and had a pretty bad week with work stuff. The problem with IT is you can't do changeovers during business hours so he was gone a LOT and really tired all week. Not really good for his mood ya know?

Then Kip's grandfather passed away. Very sad indeed. He lived a long full life and he was pretty sick towards the end, so it is for the best but still sad regardless. We went and hung out with his mom Wed. afternoon and I wish I could have done more for her. There wasn't a service or funeral, his wishes, so at least she didn't have that to deal with.

Thank goodness we are leaving next week! Myrtle Beach here we come. We are all ready for a break and to escape reality for a bit. Hope you enjoy your weekend! Will try to come back next time with happier news.